The G (D)

Right.
I'm on the floor. It's shiny laminate, with a wood pattern. I'm young, or meant to be, two or three with a 13 year olds brain full off knowledge. I try to stand - I fall. So I lie back and dart my eyes to a voice. Now In Real Life, this man's MG's dad. He's The G. He's even dressed the same as I last saw him - Blue top, high vis yellow waistcoat, arrow scraper through his belt loop and gardening gloves hanging out his pocket- Same Messy hair same everything. He goes up a ladder into the rafters of this great hall and grabs a small box out of his back pocket and putting just out off view. He comes down and smiles at me, offering his hand to help me walk. I accept, and we wander round the hall.

Now pass forward a few moments.


I'm on the floor. It's shiny laminate, with a wood pattern. I'm dressed in a black collard top, black skinny jeans going down inside my boots (Black, of course, Grey fur lined round the top, tough velvet material to the ankle, then thick rubber toe and soles), Black and silver skull tie and my hair falls in waves round my shoulders, not dyed but dark in the winter months. A shouting voice reminds me that I'm 16, and I shouldn't be on the floor. I flip my legs up and role forward to a crouch so I can stand up. I look around. The G is still around, looking the same as before, sitting in the corner, looking at me with slight concern. The voice came from his daughter, MG who is displaying an "I'm 18!" badge. Memory serves me and I figure its the 24th of April, and I must be 17 not 16. "C'mon." she says. "We need to get this done or we wont be ready. She's talking about the storms. I look over at our climbing frame. Even that's prepared. The swings are detachable canoes and it can collapse to a raft at a moments notice. "We need to clear out the loft," I say, "There are things up there that aren't prepared." I head over to the loft  and start to pull down the ladder when I'm stopped by The G. "No need, I've done it." I continue pulling down the stairs with a grunt.
"Wont mind if I check then will you."

I don't know what happened after.
This was yesterdays, I can't right up today's.

He's right.

I admit it, TB is right. I have been hiding... And I should face the truth. Why do I get the feeling he's gonna make me either way later?

Oh well. First day of Excalibur's two day shoot today. 316, exactly the same as Broadlands last Sunday. Consistant. 84 on the first ten, 84 on the second ten as well. Reynard Eladswort is on Facebook! Best Idea that's happened in a while!
But right no I'm off to watch Doctor Who! WOOOOO

Laters!

Repercussions Of Stupdity

Ok so TB re-appeared yesterday... And now.. I don't know. Big Brother my arse... Yeah I only said that so I didn't look... Stupid... But that didn't matter, did it? I mean this is TB for Christs sake... He doesn't wait around for people to make their minds up, He doesn't care how things LOOK, It's the truth that matters to him. Either that or he just likes hurting me (I doubt that) or maybe he will actually nudge me to a better way of doing things. I've always liked him a lot, but after previous experiences I tried (and failed) to hide it, so I just said I liked him like a big brother. "Of course I care, you're a big bro to me." That worked. Until he met my friends and started doing little things that made me feel jealous. Yes I got jealous over a 20 year old bastard I've never met... Stupid right? I go to TB about everything, unless it's to English for him. So when I said he hurt me? well In his own words:

Yes his actual initials are BB.. TB is his nickname ( Teddy Bear :3 ).

Well crap. Outsmarted by an American Because I haven't stopped being a liar, have I? Yeah, sure I've stopped openly telling lies about other people... But I'm still telling the lies to myself. I say I don't know what's wrong, when I do but I just don't want to admit it. I've been hiding my feelings because I was scared... And
I missed out on something I thought I already had because of it. I know that sounds weird... But this blog was never meant to make sense to others... Just me and others if they could work it out.

So. That was yesterdays mess. However.. That was yesterday, and unless there's another repercussion, it's gone. Thank goodness I have A.N though, that kid cheers me up so easily... We stick together like magnets at will come back together even if you prise us apart...

In other news, I saw Spikes yesterday! He's awesome! Check out Julies Gems, He puts it up, his wife says it. Hilarious if you ask me. No dream that I can remember last night...

If it involves Gorillas... (D)

...It's going to be weird.

Ok so I’m in what looks like an adventure room. You know the massive indoor soft playgrounds? Padded stairs, Pillars, mini walls to climb over... all in a blend of viciously bright Green, Yellow Blue and Red.  I turn around and put my hand against the wall to stop myself falling over, and it pushed in and slid to the side revealing my locker. In it there was a necklace, with three charms. One looked like a light pink jelly bean, one was almost a usb stick, but it was surrounded in rubber. The last was a dog tag, but it didn't have my name on it, it had TB's. I put the necklace on, and grabbed the next thing in the locker. It looked a lot like a green water pistol, But darker than the one below, with a flat end and a port for the usb style charm instead of the bottle for water.

It attached to my wrist so I couldn't drop it, or get it off. The last thing in my locker looked like a form, but it was metal and the options stuck to it like magnets. After reading it through I completed the options and shut my locker. I caught up in the flow off kids and headed off, going with only people I liked around me. They all clattered their  metal forms down and lined up, British flag wearers in one line (So everyone I liked) and everyone I don't like in another. We got led through to one half off the play ground, and the others to the other side. Their side was dark; ours was lit, so we had to hide from view. I hunkered down at the front wall and looked around. Everyone had black and battered versions off my gun, and they all had chambers that as I found out not long after, all shot suckered darts. I caught a glimpse of Tiger out off the corner off my eye and raised my eyebrows at him. He acknowledged me with a nod as the doors slid shut and a Power-Up buzz filled the air.  My gun glowed briefly which got some stares. Not for long, as the other teams battery packs lit up and they started firing. I ducked to avoid a dart and watched it hit someone, who promptly collapsed. I glanced over the wall only to get suckered in my head. But I wasn't affected, the sucker just dropped off, gathering more weird stares. I rested my gun on the wall, and shot over it, aiming for the glowing forehead off the guy who shot at me. Pulling the trigger, released a blast of what looked like electricity, hitting him right between his eyes. This paused game play as everyone was staring at me. Right till LS appeared and screamed, firing a round of darts straight at my chest, to no effect. whooping and cheering, my team upped the game, redoubling the attack on the other time, over 10 darts hitting LS, and many more being fired as I shot down  the rarely ending wave off people. When the last one went down Power-down occurred, but my gun didn't stop glowing. We climbed over the wall and helped our enemy's up. The darts had a way that while they were powered the person hit couldn't move, but as soon as power-down occurred they could as the darts just dissolved. We went out from this one and onto an open field. Power- Up, then it started. Out here, everyone just spread, most protecting a player to keep as their last, so we couldn’t win. But my team had (as they put it) me now, and I could just walk through unaffected. After a few more games a gorrila appeared.. . and I took to shooting anyone... I partnered  up with someone who I think was Dac... Then I woke up... 

Pics

My current drawings consist of:

More will follow.

RuneWarts? Or HogScape? (D)

Really amusing dream.
First thing I remember, Standing next to the flats. Over the other side of my road, on the grass lawn in front off them again. In between every two windows there was a door (there aren't any In Real Life). From the first door, (going from right to left or as you come down the road) came George. Yes, GPW The Best invaded my dream. along with Larry, Jakee and Pyro. But they weren't in the red Army Of Fury Capes. They were in Slytherin (Go figure) Quiditch (sp?) robes. From the next door, came Phil. But not 24-year-old Phil, the 16 year old one I've imagined in times of boredom. Followed by Manda, Jo (as I imagine her) And James. All young versions, all drssed in Ravenclaw robes. The next door? Lewis followed by Aussie, Dac and Raven (My brain missed Harry)  Dressed in Hufflepuff robes. Now I'm watching this from the outside, and from behind me a cross between Rith, Dumbledore and Mikey has appeared, Saying I better open My own clan door, hadn't I? So I go and open the last door, and TB, RM and AN appear, dressed in Gryffindor robes. My Dream Team I suppose. We all got called over, and the weird version of dumbledore revealed who was winning. Gee thought it was him, but it turned out to be my team (naturally, We'd be better than AoF any day) followed by Lewis, Gee then PJ. We went off to a class room that looked like my year four demountable, where I sat down next to CA.. We watched a trailer featuring a RC and then well I guess we went to battle. All the teams lined up, and I got put against George, who we smashed easily in the fist to fist battle, and In the mental games (not that they had much brains left, or in the first place... I kid, I love Georgie, Just not his mates) and then we fought PJ, which was easy as TB took on Manda, the only one that could fight, AN Took down James, RM just scared Jo by shouting "CUNT!" very loudly and then me and him pinned down PJ to win the fight. We didn't fight Lewis's group as we came joint first with them. Then I woke up...

Ok lots off out of order posts!

Ok, From sunday - GOLD MEDAL (W00T) and a Crystal Glass, and over 30 bites in various places... Tiring shoot but there you go.

Let me be your Angel

You are his Devil,
So let me be his Angel,
Protect him,
Save him,
Help him through,
Be his friend,
Keep him true,
Treat him well,
Don't ever yell,
You need to send - Lets make amends.

Sorry that I haven't updated...

...But It's been a hell of a few days. TB is alive... Well he was, MG Came round on Monday, We headed to the pier at half three and didn't get back till gone nine, I got a temporary phoenix tattoo and MG got "Banana" Written on her stomach (There was a distinct TB stalker theme going on) and sleep didn't happen in any great quantity...

Skyped RM and AN That evening, (Blimey does RM Have an awesome accent, I'm out to steal it, and I WILL get it!) And GS The next morning, with AN joining us until GS knocked for him and they invaded RM's house to wake him up (all off which I heard, I called GS) More than funny...
 MG went home at about four, me and dad went to Lawford and joined the Tricker & Barran dinner time (Gabs wasn't there, BOO! D: ) Got a lesson in MushSoup Making from Bryonie (she reminds me so much off myself, I think my attitude and heavy lankiness runs in this family) and left with a scrap of paper that she wrote my name on, I will keep it forever I love it so much. Today nothings happened as yet, but there's two posts coming up after this, one off my dream and one poem. Oh and I finished AFJ's Drawing!! Looks awesome. That was a couple off days ago, I'm behind. Argh!

I'm scared. Im really really scared. What if he doesn't come back? Would I know? He can't go. I need him. I love him! I rely on him! Oh god, come back! I need you!!

Uh.. Where'd you go? (D)

I was with TORCHWOOD. Gwen, Ianto, Tosh and Jack were there, but I hadn't seen Owen yet. We were in a massive store house of what looked like glass coffins. the base was square but the top tapered up into a elongated pyramidal shape. Most of them were inhabited with people, some able to breath some suffocating. Jack shouted "Where the hells Owen!?" and at the same time, I spotted him in one off the horizontal Coffins. I shouted out and ran over, the rest off the team crowding round me. All of a sudden I was the doctor, examining Owen through the plastic, sometimes putting my hand through it to test something though I shouldn't have been able to. I moved his eyelids (which were red on his pale skin) and come to the conclusion that he'd been knocked out and was going through some sort of process in the Coffin. Jack turned away searching for a way to get him out, Gwen followed him as Tosh stepped forward to scan the machine and debate with Ianto,  I shouted out again. The Coffin was rising up horizontally, and Owen looked like he was breaking up and  being compacted. I ran through the door and suddenly I remembered nothing that'd happened with the team. As far as I was concerned I was mountain biking round a Field shoot. I cycled through the trees and came out to the hill as you're heading back into Brightlingsea. I was being followed. I rolled down the hill a little way and pulled to the side, letting him pass me. I pulled out my phone from a magically appearing bag and called Gouldys number. The boy going down the hill skidded to a stop and pulled out his phone. I hung up and set off down the hill as fast as I could go, barley missing Gouldy I skidded round the weaving path, glancing back to see him following top speed. As I approached he end of the path, I skidded to a stop cycling forward a little so his fron wheel missed mine. "Will you please be more careful coming down that hill missy?" He said, Grinning at me. "I do it every day, You don't. What you doing here anyway?"  I asked. He didn't live locally, He shouldn't be in my dream. "looking for you!"
"well you've found me. So come on." We cycled off.

Now hereI hit a problem. My mother dragged me out of bed for breakfast, and I've forgotten what else happened. I blame her. So you might aswell to. Wont happen again...!

What a riverside dream... (D)

What a dream.
I'm not sure where I was, I can only remember the end really. We were in a  gem shop, you know the ones with all the different rocks, worry people, old remedies ect? We were in one of those. It had an open laminated front room, a square podium in the middle, covered in clear plastic tubs. Not the curved ones with the rounded corners pins and stuff come in the sharp edged ones I hate. I had my green cotten traders back pack on, but it had 2 large pockets not 1. In the first there was three bags of red grapes, and reminiscent of two more. the second had a pencil case, and various objects I didn't pay attention to. At the bottom there were four money bags, like the ones you get from the bank, that I tipped out into a side pocket that it took me a minute to find the entrance to. It was one where you could see the contents but how they got there has to be figured out as it blends in pretty well. there must have been 60 pounds there in £1, £2 and 50 pence pieces. I chucked the empty bags in the main compartment nearly stabbing my hand on a loud of pins as I was doing so. I started stabbing the pins into the lining, not stopping till they were all in. We then went outside and watched something on a tv like my dads conencted to his acer laptop. A lady next to me starts talking and the conversation got around to my brown coat that the hood splits up on but the back had the brightlingsea junior school logo on it in red and white stitching. It looked kinda cool, but not remembering it I protested until both laptop and screen showed memories that I thought I recognised... Then I woke up. And consequently am now pondering the thoughts of TB and trying to carefully get through the day without causing myself much more pain...

Ice knife

Thin,
Thick,
Empty.
White,
Chink.
Pierced,
Red.
Liquid,
Pulse.
Soft,
Spill.
Slow,
Pain.

GREAGHHGGGGHGHGHGHGH

Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed To do stuff but it's to dark.... Totally confused over my friendship with HIM today, but whatever, I'm honest to god worrying to much... GAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Dreams slipping away.. Noooo!
Was a weird dream.... I was in a tree for most off it....I'm not sure.... O.o

Fook yes!

STORY TIME!!  I'm getting there, Teddy might get a completed story soon... or certainly further than it was... And on the lines he was thinking as well YEASHHH!!!!!

Friends or Family?

^_^ Aiden Wacko,
:3 Ryan RyRy,
>.> Teddy Bear Brian
Are Something Close to brothers.
:) Maddy Madds
-_-Sparkly Kirsty
Are Something Close to sisters.

 I hope I never lose any off them...

Need another verse...

Is this how you see me?
Broken with fear?
Never the unscathed or the brave,
But the one that creates a future unclear?

Never was I told,
That misery was so cold,
But in an retched hope this night,
I hope that someone can make it right...


Needs another verse... What to write though?