Fly-By

Something was torn today,
or maybe it was ripped away,
All I said was goodbye,
Now the days don't fly by...

Empty Echoes inside,
Remarks no longer snide,
All I said was goodbye,
Now the days wont fly by...

Memories of mine,
Lost in time,
All I said was goodbye,
Now the days shan't fly by..

Now my greatest friend is gone,
And I simply cannot just move on,
All I said was goodbye,
Now the days can't fly by..

WARNING, SENTIMENTALITY!

I've always disliked watching people split up. Whether its a couple arguing and splitting for the sake of kids, or teen love with the wandering eyes and uncertain hearts, or friendships built on trust that crack under suspicion and lies. My parents live apart, but that doesn't get to me. What does are the other types. When I was in year 5 there were a pair of girls that were inseperable at the start of the year, and for many years before that, but by the time we were in year 6, their friendship was ashes in the wind, and to this day almost 3 years on I've never seen them speak to each other. This has happened for me aswell. A while ago I made a friend, purely on the basis of boredom, and decided to "teach" them gibberish. I used to love talking to him, he was amazingly funny, and put up with me for ages. We lost touch, for oh only a year or so, but coming back this while later, I can tell you he mastered gibberish and went on to random and cockiness aswell. Now I can't stand him, he's been an arrogant prat, and as much as the girl who loves him has been an utter bitch, he has no right to hurt her like he does. I wish I'd never me him.

Then there's the other type. The young love, with the dependancy, need and uncertainty. I've recently watched this happen as well. They were a brilliant couple, and when I first saw them together they were, (in a phrase I don't use lightly) perfect for each other. But people change. Every second inside, we think, we breath, parts of us die and parts live on, that's what life does, it evolves. That's what happened to them. He used to depend on her, I spoke to him on days he hadn't seen her, and I saw the difference in him. But gradually the change became less an less. Now he could go a few days before getting, in a way, withdrawal symptoms (as I've no other way to put it at half one in The morning only semi awake). She to didn't like going without seeing him, they both fretted about the same things without telling each other, I know because on the days they both spoke to me, the storys matched up, the worrys the same. Gradually though the change passed, he became bolder and more confident around her, she more likey to disagree with what he was saying. A couple of weeks ago people started to notice that it was going down hill, but a respectful silence stayed for the most part, I think most of us had faith that they'd hold it together. Then Saturday I texted him and got the reply that he'd ended it, indeed, for the better. He was by all means fine, he got home and ended up laughing and joking with me for the evening which was good to hear. She was worse off, but seeing them both yesterday, wednesday, its obvious they're back in agreement with each other over the important facts, her telling aforementioned bitch to just leave him alone, he did the right thing. And he did, but its still hurt inside me, just a random bystander, to watch such a loving relationship degrade. If your in my circle of friends by now you can probably guess who I'm on about by now, and I've no doubt that they'll read this, and god knows what they'll say, Devils and Angels are so hard to predict. But what I really want to say is this:
If I've loved you, if I've been your friend or helped you out, if I've been nice to you and I've respected you, even if I don't appear to anymore, even if we left on a sour note or are reading this in the future, months after I've typed it, Thank You. You've touched my life and, no matter how, it was a pleasure knowing you. You've shaped my life to what it is today, and where I'm at today is a good place to be. And I put this call out to those from my old clans aswell, Kingdom Of Loyalty, Army Of Fury, and my current, Monks Of Guthix, thank you all. Even the ones I've sworn at, even those that walked away, Water, Air, Fire and Blood, you've changed me, you've helped me, and I'm better off for you.


But most of all thank you to the ones that stayed. Wacko, RyRy, Mikey, David, brilliant guys who all have a permanent place in my heart, thank you. Georgieyy, Madds and even Kirsty, thank you girls, you've helped me see a lot.

And last of all, Brian. Teddy you've put up with me, corrected me and corrupted me, you've made me laugh and made me cry, you've been perfect and you've been amazingly weird, but that's who you are and it won't change. Thank you. I'd be worse off if it wasn't for you, you of all people know how weak willed I can be.

LOVE YOU ALL NUTTERS.

Love you all.

Phoenix

For TB, 'Cause he's a daft twit.

With a hidden meaning for a familiar Heart-Of-Gold guy... :D

Sorrayyy

Sorry about the last 2 posts, they were experiments.

My whole world of denial has been thrown about since my last proper post. I've also come down with a horrid bug, started a third picture for TB, And I've restarted on my Glance story, which seems to be rescue-able. But seriously, it's kind of easy to freak me out, however what has happened  I love, as much as I hate it.

Circuit

Playing around in science at school, bloggerworks!

Wooo Happy Morning :D

Mikey is alive! Wooooo :D
Just a really busy guy.
Oh well, I'm just really REALLY REALLY glad he replied.

I can breath easy for a while. WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Sorry, I'm just really REALLY  REALLY REALLY happy now.


yay :3

Some things have to be said

I'm writing this because some things are meant to be told. Some things aren't. Whether this gets published or not doesn't matter. In my head once a word is written, it doesn't bother me, And I need these words to stop bothering me. Because I need to move on. I need to forget the times we talked, and the times we skyped until late at night, the messages we sent and the times you comforted me when all I could do was cry. I need to forget the look on your face and the crack in your voice when you lost your best friend and the gleam in your eye when we shared the same views. I need to forget the image of you running your hand through your hair when I couldn't decide what colour it was, and you in shirt and shorts leaning on your bent knees as you sat in the dark. I need to forget the times I sat in the corner of my school library and checked my phone for facebook messages, and the feelings I felt when I did and didn't find them. I NEED to forget YOU, and every time you said you loved me. Every time you said my name and called me by the name only we would use. Every time you sent me a love heart just to make me smile, and every time you made me laugh.

I NEED TO FORGET YOU.

But can I?

No. 'Cause you will forever be My Cheeky Cookie, and  I will always remember you, and everything that happened.


I NEED TO MOVE ON.

But can I?

Yeah, but only because if I don't I'll get left behind, I'll be looked down on, and what I fear the most will happen.

I'll be forgotten.

And I don't want that.
Yeah you've forgotten me by now. You've got your girl and well I have TB, or rather he has me. And I don't mind.I just don't want you bothering me. TB said I need to go and I'm going... I just needed to write it.

So I'll write on last thing.

I'm Sorry. I never meant to hurt you, When all you were doing was trying to help. PJ I loved you Cookie, I did. I'm so sorry we ended that way.

My Pocket Litter

Ok so there are plenty of things that I have in my pockets. From pens to phone numbers I don't know the owner of to balls of foil and wads of paper. But three objects come every where with me, and that's because they are little boosters, reminders of my friends.

May not look like much but let me explain.

The Tigers eye stone is always cold and it reminds me off the things that happen if I don't keep my calm, the people that get hurt and what that can do to the people around me. It shines under the light and the sun makes it look like an actual Tigers eye.

The Necklace (skull) is turquoise stone, which in lore is meant to keep away many evils, though In my head it traps evils. It has all the little evils of my Shout! group in it, and always reminds me that they're there, whether they like it or not.

The last object I made. It was my first try at making Runes from RuneScape, and out of the four I tried to make (Cosmic, Law, Blood/Water and Earth) This one came out the best. Most of my friends have a Rune I associate to them, and Earth is Mikey. I keep my rune on me 'cause everything Mikey tells me slips from my mind, but my rune makes me think, makes me remember and gives me a way to get out of every hole I've been stuck in. Like the Element, Mikey is dependable and strong and though I rarely see him these days, his presence lingers in most things I do. I love my rune despite the fact it's rubbish compared to the others I have done.

Paint Snow leopards with the Joker and Ally Carter...? (D)

Last nights dream was just... Wow. Big Snow leopards, a murder mystery mansion and .. The Joker!?!

Well yeah seriously, that is what It involved. Trying to keep the Leopards hidden, to unearth the REAL happenings behind the murder (which involved loads of "Cry Of The Ice Mark" References) and all before The Joker got there With his water blocks (because despite the beleivable HD mod pack it was still just a minecraft mansion, where the Joker has a hacked inventory an I DON'T). Yeah  I really need to stop playing that game.
Where The joker reference came from... Must have been here 'cause it's just really cool tune.
http://www.youtube.com/user/Paint#p/u/1/ExAt1pQ9IwE

Snow Leopards I can Blame AD for, as he leant me those books! And Mystery? Well I know a few people who are mysterys and TBs words yesterday felt like I'd never get out of the labyrinthine madness of him, so yeah as always, I blame Teddy! So yeah. I'd write it up but the mature (and immature) content would be freaky to admit! I have it written up in my notes on George (My netbook. I name things, OK?) so if I decide to upload it I will remember it. I was sorely tempted to upload a dream I have Written down from May/June time, however that's on Maddz (My main computer... Because it has a super pair! Of Screens) And I'm not back there till Sunday and to be honest I want my weekend to last. After such a really draggy week I need a rest. So I'll blog again when I wake up from my hole of Jason Aldean (again.. Dammit TB!) Ally Carters Don't Judge A Girl By Her Cover  Gallagher Academy Series book and the waist high Pile of homework. 


Laters all!

foooooooooooooodddd (ugh)

Can't eattttttttt
however..


The weeping angel you called ugly? She can't even look at herself in the mirror. See that unemotional Cybermen? He used to be one of us. The Oods that you make fun of? They get treated as slaves everyday. The lady that you called crazy? She knows all of time and space. See the weird man with the bowtie and the fez? He's the loneliest man in the universe. Reblog this if you're against bullying in the Time-Space Continuum..

Yesterdays food (and (D))

Was brilliant! McDonalds breakfast, 2 cheese and onion pasty + 3 dohnuts for lunch, another dohnut for supper and a whole bottle of TESCOS Active Sports Drink. Like lucozade but better and cheaper.

The dream was beyond weird. I was a princess and it was a ceremony at a weird temporary shack. I went off to find some off the royal Housecarles (My wording, I blame AD for giving me the icemark chronicles to read) and I bumped into A weird version of PJ/John (the gay one from TORCHWOOD see kiss kiss bang bang episode :3) who was dressed in basicly a black velvet sheet (I got the image from my pocket quiver, it hangs weird) Who basicly too me hostage until "Jack"(Ok, Ok, It was TB, but so much cuter and very gay/strong/ idolish)  got there, Who lo and behold was never gonna put up with PJ (to be honest thank god the dream went that way, the other way is scary) and banished him, which made me run away and colapse, and wake up in the medical tent with Jack/TB and the housecarles surrounding me with very worried looks, to which I just sat up and shouted BOO! which scared them crapless. Glad to seem e alive we all went back to the ceremony me on the shoulders of two of the housecarles and than I think I woke up...

Burn

From the dead grows new,
Reminders of what those once knew,
From the ashes raise a fire,
One that can burn so much brighter...

Than the memories that laid the path
Than the life that fell away,
Than the chaos of the aftermath,
Than the courage of those so brave

Whispers on the wind,
Of what that has been,
A glimmer in the dark
That can cause the greatest spark...

For the memories that laid the path
For the life that fell away,
For the chaos of the aftermath,
For the courage of those so brave...

We see the shine,
From down in the mine,
But only for now good sire,
Cmon people let's build a pyre!

To remember the memories that laid the path
To honour the life that fell away,
To muster chaos of the aftermath,
To add ours to the courage of those so brave

Don't lose faith,
In the world we knew,
Leave our trace,
This world needs you!

Taken

Sadness shiver,
I'm going no where,
Even if it's just a sliver,
Take it - I'm staying here.

I have none left,
You have it all,
A spread out gift,
It's oh so small.

Don't break it,
I'm still healing cracks,
Hard to admit,
Keep it on track.

All yours,
Earned and payed,
Save yours,
I'm never dismayed.